


three?

by thisshitsstupidbutwhatever (orphan_account)



Category: My Own Head
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-23
Updated: 2020-01-23
Packaged: 2021-02-27 13:14:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 367
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22367764
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/thisshitsstupidbutwhatever
Summary: all in one day





	three?

man three posts in one day? i’m really stuck in my head today

turning off every light in my room felt nice. but i couldn’t clear my head

the slight buzz of a facetime call, the lyrics of a forgotten song spinning in my head

there’s no true silence.

which sucks ass. like, i can’t think properly, and it makes people think they are doing things wrong

no matter how many times i try, it’s not working

try another method. please, just try another fucking method. for your sake and hers.

i claim to know her better than anyone else, but how true is that? ofc i’ve never felt this way about someone but do i know her know her?* 

i didn’t want to hang up the phone, i didn’t want to lie about the connection. i didn’t want her to leave. 

but i also didn’t want the questions:

what’s wrong  
why are quiet all of a sudden  
talk to me

i wish i could, i wish i could open up to you like a book but i don’t even have the key to my book. i don’t know what’s wrong. i’m just wrong. 

i feel right when i’m with you, but i’m not with you right now 

i wonder what she’s thinking about right now. i shouldn’t have hung up. but i just wanted darkness and my phone was too bright. like this right now is too bright.

but i know she’ll see this tonight because of her and she panics and checks everything which is shitty. why does she have to check everything? i should just tell her something ups but idk what and i don’t want to talk about it. but the silence after will kill me. so i shut down, temporarily, until i know what’s wrong. then we tackle it as a team. because this is my favorite team. and i’ll do anything for my teammate. 

so here’s my explanation to why i shut down. because i don’t know what’s wrong and i don’t want you to try and dissect me like a frog in 7th grade. 

*also why do people do that? repeat a word and it suddenly had a different meaning.


End file.
